A strange night in Barcelona…

The evening started off normally enough when Gemma and I went to catch the train. But the train was full of people and it was pretty difficult to get on, let alone find a seat.
Someone who did have a seat was a gypsy girl. The reason I noticed her was that she had one of those fruit juice cartons… the small, designed for packed lunches variety. She was tearing the top off this empty carton and I thought to myself "What's she going to do with that?".

A minute later, I looked back and what did I see? The girl was milking her breasts into the little carton. I was stunned! I had to turn around so I wasn't looking. This was one of the strangest things I've ever seen. Wonder what she did with the milk. "Throw it away, I hope" was Gemma's response to the riddle.

Much later (around 3 am), we were walking down a backstreet on our way to a club. Adam uttered the immortal words "Oh watch out here, this is the place I was robbed". Now for those who aren't aware of the risks posed by walking out late at night in Barcelona, let me tell you this: you can get robbed. Everybody gets robbed. I've never been robbed. I imagine (and have had confirmed by victims of multiple robberies) that while yes, you get robbed and that's terrible, it's still not as dangerous as Paris, Rome, London, New York etc etc. What I'm trying to say is that it's risky, but not really that bad… very few people are ever threatened with a weapon.
As Adam finished saying his immortal words, I suddenly became aware that the street urchin pestering me to buy some beer off him had been with us too long, was too close to me, and had his hand in my pocket. My back pocket. On my wallet.
I shouted, "Adam, quick… he's got his hand on my wallet!". Gemma tried to grab him (the street urchin), but he had my wallet in a trice, and sprinted off.
I, naturally, ran hot on his heels, round a corner into an alleyway. As he accelerated away from me, he chucked my wallet to the ground.
I picked it up and looked inside… some stuff was missing. Funnily enough, I hadn't actually had any cash. But I do have cards for here, the UK and Australia as well as my cherished identity card which took me two years to manage to get. That was all missing.
I ran back to Adam and Gemma and advised them that I seemed to have lost some important stuff (actually, my Spanish bank card was still in my wallet).
Next thing I knew, Gemma was talking with three big guys who had a load of cards they had found at exactly the spot where I was robbed. I grabbed them out of their hands (I wasn't feeling very civil by now)… and to my astonishment, I had everything back again (including my ID).

So the robber got nothing (apart from practice and some exercise).

After all this, I was elated. We went on to the club.